I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should bokeh offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for porn caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and bokeh memek declared the woman an ‘actrice’, porn or bokeh sex worker.

Now, porn according to this new study from the ever-liberal bokeh Swedes, bokeh it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what bokeh most women know and porn all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokep you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: porn there’s sex as performance art, crot and bokeh sex as genuine intimacy. And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokeh trusts her partner and memek is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, crot she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokeh moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian bokeh hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, memek female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, bokeh they’d explain, crot so they could make their partner feel happy, porn while conserving their energy for porn other tasks in hand. This was porn the conclusion crot of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and porn bokeh ‘manipulation’, porn and bokeh that women were prone to what they described porn as bokeh ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, crot so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot the greater bokep the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: memek ‘I’m enjoying this, crot but bokeh can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, bokep ladies?

The only other reason to screech crot like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, bokep where loud always equals better.

As bokeh a woman from Sunderland bokep said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: crot ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokeh only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, porn Sex At Dawn, memek Christopher Ryan and bokeh Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and porn keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, porn I can understand bokep the need to advertise. But if you’re not, crot then men should take heed: crot the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris